I'm Not Comfortable With Crime

Before she went insane, Granny was in trade.

Worked out of the Middle East, where the money's made.

 

Daddy's in this secret club, the one they call the MOB

The Most Orderly Brethren; it's kinda like a lodge.

 

Now Granny's in the nuthouse and Daddy's with the MOB.

My sister launders money - she says it's better than a job.'

And me, me, me, oh my! I pay my mortgages on time,'

I'm a watchin every dime.

I don't think I could do the time, (baby),

I'm not comfortable with crime.

 

My brother, he goes fishin, down off of 'North Shore

Don't know what he's catchin, (comes in little white packagin)

But they're always wantin more!

 

Met me a detective - What a cute guy!'

He's interested in my family - but I dunno why!

 

Yeah, Granny's in the nuthouse and Daddy's with the MOB.

My sister launders money - she says it's better than a job.'

And me, me, me, oh my! I pay my mortgages on time,'

I'm a watchin every dime.

I don't think I could do the time, (baby),

I'm not comfortable with crime

 

My honey's planned a party; I'm gonna bake my best pies,

We've invited all the family - It'll be a surprise!

 

Chorus

I'm not comfortable, I'm not comfortable - with crime!

 

© Val Sherwood

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